New and Improved Monkey Proof Bananas - Mini Sized

Recently I watched a internet posted video in which a man explained the best way to peel a banana. And lo and behold, it was true and his method was better. What was the trick? See the video below for the explanation.

How I see it, the monkey had a few million years to perfect the art of banana peeling - we as humans only had possibly thousands. And being humans, we were not going to admit that we were doing it wrong. So... we just kept doing the same old way. Sort of like the guy who won't stop to get directions, even though he knows he's lost. "Damn it woman, I know where I'm going, now quit nagging me so much." Or the guy that won't dare use the instruction manual that comes with a piece of office furniture or electronics equipment.

Monkeys be damned, I just don't want to admit that the easiest way to peel a banana... is well... that easy. Now apes be warned! Humans have concocted a banana that is resistant to your foolish endeavors... mu hahaha! I give you... the mini banana.

I attempted my new monkey technique on these little suckers... it's a no go. The technique of squeezing the end and peeling back skin is not only difficult but results in the banana being smashed. Some how science has found a way to shrink bananas and intentionally or unintentionally prevent the monkey peeling method. Personally, I'm very proud of modern science for doing so. Now monkeys will have to fumble through the ritual of trying to open bananas like everyone else. Serves them right.

For the record, in mini bananas (or bananettes as I call them) -

Science 1

Apes 0

So what if mini bananas are too expensive, too small, too hard to find, too bananay - they're still monkey proof. So if you are on team Charlton Heston, then be happy that you're bananas are now safer than ever from monkey hi-jinx.

"Take your stinking paws off [my mini bananas], you damned dirty ape!"